So inspired by Ly, and the amusingness of this list I wanted to know how Grey my future cop, and Kane who wanted to be an FBI agent , and my detective Vance stack up against the cliches!
- one cop would hold another wounded cops- and then they'd both shoot a baddie just as he was running up to kill themGrey would be the wounded, Kane would be there holding him. Though I don't think they'd have the luck to get the baddy at the last minute.
As far as I know this has not happened to Vance. He works alone to darn much. But if said event happened he would shoot a fireball at the bad guy not a bullet
- baddie always coming back when he was WAY too clearly dead/defeated....we'll see. One can only hope it's not the case...but now I'm really going to be looking over my shoulder for Angelos. Watch out Grey!
I'm going to say yes. And it annoys Vance to no end.
- The "I was __ days/months from retirement"hahaha nay. Neither of them are close,
Hmm come on old guy. How close are you to retirement Vance? -ducks fireball- just kidding!
1. The hero sustains a gunshot wound. Cops aren't invincible, but almost. Shooting the hero cop in the arm, leg or side will only slightly inconvenience him. If he's shot in an extremity, he will still be allowed a limited degree of motor function (i.e. able to wield a gun or throw a punch). Never will he bleed to death or pass out or be shot anywhere that completely ruins his day.For Grey? No. No he gets hurt all the time. I would say either he is danger prone or the universe hates him.
Kane has managed to avoid more than a concussion but he's only invincible to magic.
Vance? Oh gosh...please don't get him started on that one time he was a rookie...please don't ask! He may never shut up.
2. The hero's love interest is a knockout…and available! Cops are usually separated, divorced, widowed or all of the above. They’re loners, but not completely against the idea of hooking up. So when a potential love interest — one who’s usually part of the hero cop’s investigation in some capacity — enters his life, she’s not only stunning, she’s unattached. Or, her boyfriend/husband is the villain and thus he deserves to be cuckolded.Hey well, Chris is available right Grey? -nudges- Ok so my 14 genius future cop hasn't really had this problem.
Kane? Well he had a knock out fiance! Had...key word.
Vance has a beautiful wife, who is like uppers for his depression. -nods-
3. The hero will either turn in his badge or be suspended. Unfortunately, the whole “innocent until proven guilty” thing takes a lot of the momentum out of a 2-hour action movie. A hero cop, however, has a crime-fighting tool — his “gut” — that can tell him if a suspect’s guilty or not, and it doesn’t cost the taxpayers a cent in some long, drawn out criminal trial! The only drawback is that the cop’s superior is a stickler for due process of the law. As such, the cop will either be removed from active duty or voluntarily turn in his badge and be able to carry out his own unique brand of justice — vigilantism! — without a bunch of red tape getting in the way.So far so good! Kane is a vigilanti already! Grey isn't a cop yet. Vance is always about one step from being kicked out but hasn't yet!
4. The hero is a much better shot than the villains. In movies, Los Angeles looks a lot like Sadr City. It is a bullet festival. And not only can the hero cop acrobatically dodge small arms fire from the endless supply of henchmen who are shooting at him from all angles, he can also return fire at a much greater success rate. This is true, of course, until the third act when the cop sustains a minor, but not career-ending flesh wound, like I mentioned above.hahhaa no, no the evidence says the villains are pretty good shots, or fighters...ect. Grey used to be pretty powerful before he burned out, now he's at square one. Kane is a great shot, but he never has the oppritunity to prove it. Vance has yet to hit anyone in an RPG with his fireball but I imagine his aim is at least decent.
5. The villains are foreigners. Americans are awesome. Everyone else in the world only wishes they were as awesome as we are. I believe that’s what “E Pluribus Unum” stands for. At any rate, if it weren’t for a bunch of Eurotrash in three-piece suits, coming into our country and shooting haphazardly at our hero cop, this country would be even more awesome than it currently is, which is pretty awesome.Both true and false. There are foreign villains but Americans...not that awesome ;) No really. Angelos is foreign -giggles- but other villains are locals. I imagine Vance has taken on blocks from all over. So has Kane.
6. The hero’s superior officer is a secondary antagonist. As I mentioned above, the hero cop will doubtless come into conflict with his chief, a pencil-pushing bureaucrat who rides a desk all day and has no effing idea what it’s like to be a cop on the streets. The hero’s superior officer personifies our broken system, and although he might not be foreign, he will probably at the very least look French.hahhaha for Vance? Yes. Of course. All the higher ups drive him crazy, but honestly it's more him being anal than them being meanies. Wow...so Vance is
actually the difficult one. Grey doesn't have a superior yet, but since it might end up being Vance...see previous statement. Kane worked for Angelos. So he wasn't the
secondary antagonist
7. The hero trusts someone who will ultimately betray him. I’ve never seen a buddy cop movie in which one of the buddies turns on the other; I wrote a script with that reversal, but I’ve never seen it elsewhere. That being said, everyone else is suspect — even that knockout love interest who’s curiously single. Someone will sell out the hero to the villains because they’re threatening to kill a person of great importance to the betrayer.For Grey? Angelos maybe...not sure he trusted him. Anna betrayed him ages ago. Vance probably will just by being Vance.
Kane hasn't been betrayed yet. -ducks- becare there brah!
Vance? Yes. Very betrayed, and by his best friend!
8. Strip clubs are essential to solving any mystery. If you can’t shoehorn a wholly unnecessary love story into your cop movie, then what kind of a screenwriter are you, anyway? Still, there’s more than one way to capture a pair of breasts on film and make it seem organic to the plot. The preferred method is to set a scene in a strip club, where the hero cop can enjoy a few drinks, some relaxing music and a colossal number of boobs as he puzzles over the investigation.Grey is 14, and it's not Kane's cup of tea. He likes women, a lot, but stripers...nah. Vance? Oh yeah. Very yeah. Before Payton of course but yeah.
9. The hero is a casual dresser. Most hero cops are average Joes, like you and me. They’re not empty suits; those are his superiors. No, the hero cop dresses like he’s either going to a ball game or going to kick some nogoodnik foreigners in the balls. His outfit also reflects his contempt for the establishment. And he’s a slob.Grey? Check. Kane? Check. Vance? Check. Ok TRUE but Kane isn't a slob. The other two kind of are...
10. The hero will rattle off a one-liner to a corpse. Hero cops talk to the dead…in bitingly sarcastic tones. After bumping off the big bad or one of his underbosses, the cop will say something related to how the poor schmuck died, which is in a manner that’s often bizarre or unusually painful. This impromptu eulogy typically has a humorous component, done more for the audience’s benefit than to celebrate the life that was just ended. It is creepy and needless, though, if you think about it.Since Grey "died" when said villain did he didn't get a chance. Don't worry Grey's ok now...but hopefully he won't have another chance.
Kane? Nah.
Vance would probably grumble at the corpse for being in his way.
11. The hero has the body of an Adonis. Although he chain smokes and drinks like a fish with a history of alcohol abuse, the hero cop is in peak physical condition. He will more than likely appear shirtless in at least one scene — usually while bedding the love interest — and reveal a sweat-glazed torso that’s full of muscle. If he also shows his buttocks, his butt cheeks will be firm enough that one could break a chair over them. Grey will eventually be a "heart throb" but no not buff in any way. At least he will be tall!
Vance...is decent looking. Just decent.
Kane however, I've been told by a muse, is hot. hahaha. I must say I agree :D
12. The villain will use the hero’s partner and/or lover as a human shield. This is the ultimate predicament for our hero cop. It’s been done to death, but I know I’ll see it in a thousand more movies before the Rapture. Nonetheless, this is probably my favorite cliche because it hinges on the very notion that villains have apparently never seen a movie in their entire lives. The human shield will, without fail, elbow his or her captor in the chops and duck out of the way so the hero cop can put a bullet in him.Grey? yes. Kane has been used against him. Grey has been used against Kane. They are each others weakness.
Vance? Um...no. No that would fail. He usually works alone and isn't quite caring enough for that to work on...or even for someone to try against him really.
Bonus round: The villain will produce a pistol from out of nowhere, so the hero can justifiably shoot him. Hero cops are not cold-blooded killers. When the main badguy’s defeated and (apparently) disarmed at the film’s climax, the hero can’t simply blow their head off, regardless of how much he’d like to. Then he’d be no better than the garbage he’s trying to take out! So, the villain will somehow make a weapon materialize out of thin air, and allow for our hero cop to gun him down in good conscience.True in some ways. Kane and Grey are not cold blooded. Both believe strongly in taking in their baddie alive if possible. However, if pushed they have both proven they will kill.
Vance would so shoot the baddie anyway >.>
So clearly Vance is not a buddy cop.
Kane and Grey are but not in the cliche norm. ALL of them fit better in a drama then a cop show
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